When I talk to straight men in prison or gay men on the streets I get the same feedback, “What’s it like being around all that potential?!” Well, it’s awful.

It’s not like window shopping where you can look but not touch. It’s not like some porn you’ve seen where there is a neatly scripted gang-bang in the shower. Its more like a house of horrors. 

Imagine this, imagine you meet someone who understands you. They get your past, are excited for you future and you about theirs. They are a great fit for your needs emotionally, physically, and sexually. They are a perfect partner. Imagine they live right next door maybe, or in the next building? Imagine you see them everyday, you both know that you are meant for one another. Perfect right?

Now imagine that if anyone even slightly suspected such a thing was happening, you’d be punished. Yeah, no notes, no kisses on the cheek or hugs, no giddy waves to indicate how excited you are…any display that indicates there may be a relationship even slightly will result in permanent separation. Still sound like fun?

As LGBT people in prison this is the case. Our perfect partner could be within 300 ft. of us at any given time, yet we must not act on our genetic impulse to show healthy, appropriate affection, because being gay (the act thereof, you can “say” your gay, but to commit an “act” of homosexuality is definitely illegal in DOC…welcome to equality) is not allowed here. If you don’t control your desires, someone will by force. For anyone on the parole board, like me, if I have any sexual contact it will put me in prison for the rest of life potentially. Even though the other party would be a healthy, stable adult capable of making sound decisions. 

Prison isn’t for LGBT. 

With Love
Jeff Utnage