I am the youngest of the two children of Randall Lee Havens and Terry Louise Hogle/Forte. I grew up in a military family. My mother enlisted in the United States Army when I was very young and so we never lived in the same place for more than three to four years. Throughout my childhood I lived in Washington State, Colorado, Texas, California, Michigan, and Bremerhaven Germany. Moving around became a common theme in my life which carried into my adulthood. I was already fairly awkward as a child. I always felt as if I didn’t fit in. When I would finally begin meeting some good friends, we would move again and repeat the process.

My time in Germany was wonderful.. We would go for long bike rides into Berchesgarten and go to the park there. We enjoyed the rich history, and even got to see some historic events. For example, I played soccer as a child, and every year our team would travel and play teams in different areas. So, I visited Berlin yearly for a time. On our first trip, we were made to go through “checkpoint Charlie” and show our passports to enter East Berlin. The wall was up, and so my family and I painted our names on the wall. I recall the mood being so much different from East to West Berlin. The next year, when we returned, the wall was coming down. People were electric.. and things were changing. That year our team was beat worse than before, and I left with a chipped tooth! 🙂 The following year, the wall was down completely.

When we moved back to the United States, we moved to Washington for my second time. Everyone was new, new town, new neighborhood, and so I had to begin to make new friends again. This was normal for me. I was in third grade, and it was here where my mother tells me that I helped kids in their math. ..my memory is fuzzy, and I don’t recall this at all, but I was told that I helped kids two grades up from me.

Somewhere around this time we had George Bush (senior) as president. This is when active military began shipping out for the “War in the Gulf”, which began as Operation Desert Shield. My mother shipped out to Iraq for what seemed like a long time. Then things heated up in the political climate and active military redeployed for Operation Desert Storm. My mother was there for both. This is where things really changed for me because when she came back, my mother and father broke up and divorced. My mother fell in love during her time in the desert, and after she returned, my father moved away to Colorado.

This was the time of my first year in high school. I began getting in trouble by acting out. My first suspension was from hacking the computers in our school computer lab. Really, there was no hacking. I wrote a macro which caused all of the words on the screen to float and dance like a slow tornado hit the alphabet! I thought it was funny. The school did not share my sentiments. Not too long after, my mother was called for schooling in Texas through the military. So again, I moved, but this time, I moved with my dad in Colorado. This was where I tried my first drug.

This was my second high school I attended now. Everywhere I was at, I was the “new kid”. So I was always in a state of trying to fit in. I always had to reestablish myself, and so when I was in the company of a pretty girl who offered me up my first drug, I gladly accepted. This began a pattern which continued well into my adulthood. It also caused a rift between my father and I. Soon, I acted out so bad that I was sent right back to my mother, now in Texas.

By now I had a step father, whom I didn’t immediately accept. Actually, I recall meeting him by throwing a pitcher of water on him. I was mean to him for no other reason than he wasn’t my father. So again, I began in another high school. Here, I was already involved with drugs, and so I fit right in with those types. I would skip school and hang out with my new friends, then I’d get into trouble and have to answer to my mom. Then my step father would interject, when he felt that my mother was being treated badly by me. Of course I resented him for any type of interjection, but this was consistent, and it showed me over time that he really loved my mother. This is what caused me to finally accept him as family. ..meanwhile, I stayed in trouble while I was in Texas. My acting out became committing petty crimes. My friends and I would sneak out of our houses at night and roam the streets looking for spare change in the ash trays of random cars. Really, this was our nightly activity. We would roam the streets, opening every unlocked car door, only to steal the change left in the ashtrays. This caused me trouble with the law at an early age.. The police looked at each case of opening a car door as a felony, and so I became a “career criminal” at the age of 15.

Well, here is where things get interesting. My schooling as a child had all but stopped completely. I never attended, and returning meant that the police would find me. At this time, I was skilled at evading police, trained to dislike them, and I was currently in a heap of trouble. Getting caught would mean I would go to jail for a long time. This began my life on the streets.

End Part 1

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