From where I sit in this place I get the vantage point of what it used to be like for homosexuals in the earlier years. Like pre-60’s when in order to express sexuality you had to take risks and hide. Doing things, like love, under the watchful eyes of those who seek to end your created being.

Prison is still in that stage where they believe it’s ok to prevent relationships among homosexuals. Only they use the guise of safety and security to mask their bigotry. After all, of gays can have relationships in prison than why not make all prisons co-ed and let everyone have relationships? I don’t have an answer for that and I truthfully don’t care. In my humble opinion, LGBT people should be housed separately from both men and women and transgendered people should be housed where they feel the most secure. Though, that is a sticky one, I know.

What is happening is that LGBT people in prison have learned to hide their relationships, at least those that are brave enough to engage in them. Which bravery it is. It was 50 years ago and it is today. Look at history.

LGBT people in prison may find the perfect mate in here, but as soon as anyone finds out about it, you are separated and punished. Imagine that…equality at it’s finest.

I am among those who refuse to have relationships in prison, not because I agree with DOC (which clearly I do not, and if it’s unclear to you still…) but because it is unhealthy to hide such things. I have been in long term relationships where I was able to express affection openly and freely. I refuse to hide my feelings for another, so instead I choose to not allow inmate relationships for myself.

But that isn’t fair. It’s not fair to me because I am at a point in my life where I am healthy and stable enough to have a loving and practical relationship with someone. So I keep telling myself that I will wait for someone from the outside to develop a relationship with. The problem with that is, the few people that have written me that were single end up finding the “one” soon after, I swear I am like “Good Luck Chuck” for queers! Sooo frustrating!

So while I hate policy, I follow it, begrudgingly. I pray and hope that someone will soon come and see me beautiful in their eyes and be willing to jump into the ocean of life with me. Until then…

With Love