Being gay in prison is complicated. Your allowed to say your gay but your only allowed to say it. No physical representation of it is acceptable. We are surrounded by thousands of men who are, for all intents and purposes, potential suitors both physically and emotionally. Yet, we must resist. Because there is punishment for even saying your interested in someone.

We are sometimes given decades to do in here with no one on the streets to engage with us. Physical and emotional needs must be met for most people. I guess there are a few lucky ones who don’t have this problem of needing physical contact. 

The system says that being gay isn’t the problem and having sex isn’t the problem. Its the predatorization of gays that they are curbing by blanketing a policy like no inmate to inmate relationships in any form. I have t admit that rape does happen in prison but its happening even with this policy in place. So what I get from it is this: Hide your sexuality, because if you don’t you’ll get raped and because we told you to hide it and you didn’t you kinda brought it on yourself…sign this waiver. 

As LGBT people we should have our own unit. Our needs are unique as inmates. Our struggles are different then others. Our thinking is different. We have different psychological needs that need to be met and an environment such as a prison where we are under constant pressure to be quiet and act straight is hardly a good place to recover.

Some people in prison really like this place and the violence it teaches. But some of us don’t and instead of all of us being lumped together as equals we should be identified and separated. The current inmate classification system is broken and failing. The current system doesn’t allow for inmates to concentrate solely on fixing their problems. There is always something else to fixate our attention on, like making our beds and only brushing our teeth when lights are on or protecting ourselves from known sexual predators that they sent to our prison from a maximum security prison. You know, little things like that. 

Inmates who want to change make it known fast. They display behavior that is unique and easily recognizable. While those who like this lifestyle are equally recognizable. Instead of separating us at all they force us to live together in conditions that promote inmate hierarchy and staff encourages it by allowing it to happen and DOC headquarters promotes it by refusing to recognize that we have different needs and some of those needs are extremely easy to meet so long as we can. concentrate on them.

If a gay man wants to have a relationship in prison I think he should be allowed to. Because right now its horrible to see someone that you may be in love with and you can’t tell a single soul lest you be punished. Think about that for a minute…punished for even mentioning that you might like someone. With this going on inside of some gay men its no wonder they keep coming back because they don’t have a healthy grasp on what to talk about, what to purge from themselves. 

Just a few thoughts…

With Love