A guy hits on me privately, afraid of what his partners will think. But his partners dog him for talking to me at all and before you know it he’s either making up excuses to come talk to me or he’s acting like a jerk to avoid his urge to come talk to me.

This happens to me a lot in prison. In times past I get seriously bitchy about the whole thing. Make sure the man understands he’s too weak to be with me, that we’re not on the same level. My icy heart relished in that, if I’m being honest.

I know something ole’ boy doesn’t:

His partners, the ones that dog him for talking to me, they’ve all hit on me. Some of them the same day they talk crap to him for talking to me publicly.

To avoid problems I just disconnect from all of them. But recently I tried something different. I told the dude his partners that make fun of him, they are simply jealous because they’ve all hit on me. Now they’re talking crap because they still have it in their minds that without him they still have a chance.

I still won’t ever date anyone who buckles under social pressure because being a trans woman who’s previously incarcerated comes with baggage. Besides, I’m hit on a bunch and whoever I date needs to be secure enough in who they are to know that it’s all gonna be okay no matter if I’m hit on or hated.

Homeboys, they’re the problem.

With Love
Ruth

To help support or share in my release, please visit my gofundme at:

https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-ruth-utnages-reentry-after-prison

Thanks.