Dad, I’m sitting up late in Clallam Bay, this place is filled with so much hate. Waiting for a haircut. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. My god is this really where I have to spend the next fifteen years. The guard yells over the loud speaker, Byers! Haircut!

Walking out of the unit at night is one of the few peaceful things to do, I get to be alone for a minute or two. I walk real slow, eyes closed, imagining I’m free walking the streets. No one but me in the court yard, not even the guards. It brings back memories of a time when mom used to tell me I couldn’t leave the yard.

Dad, did you know I used to sneak out that little window. Walking the streets, and kissing girls down at woods creek. I’d stay out all night till the sky turned blue, mom and Paul never even knew.

I miss being young, waiting for you in the living room, looking out the bay windows for you to arrive in your cool white Oldsmobile. I can still hear you yelling with excitement ” WooooooH ! Where’s my sunny bunny at “, then running up an giving me a huge bear hug and laughing out loud. Dad, you always smelled so good wearing some kind of Cologne, and your car had one of them yummy vanilla dangling scented trees.

Driving me home from the mall and movies we cross the railroad tracks as we drive by the Monroe smoke stack. You tell me things will get better son. Before I get out and shut the door, please can I come stay with you.

Dad, I love you no matter what mom may say about you.

Marshall Byers