Monday January 18th, 2016
Changing Your Environment: A Lesson From Inside These Walls
Changing your environment seems like a monumental task. I am here to tell you that it’s actually fairly easy. Perhaps you can’t change the environment totally, but you can certainly change how your treated in that environment. Prison is a melting pot of all kinds of emotional trauma. You don’t need to be a PHD to figure that out. Something led men to prison…
In here you have options to deal with all the personalities you come across. There are all types, go getters, laziness, angry, oblivious, slutty, demeaning etc. Name it, it’s here. This is what I do to keep happiness around me, I suggest you try it. It’s a basic system.
First, I compliment the people I run across. I never let them think that I think negatively about them. Even if I do, I force myself to point out a positive, even in my head. Then, when we speak, however long or short, I listen. Then when we have a future conversation, I do it again. Even if it’s in passing, I continue to set that standard of positive interactions. After this is done for a few times, they begin to expect that pattern of behavior out of you and will almost always bring the same.
You will get the occasional “debbie downer”, I encourage you to continue to feed the positive side of them, set that standard that you want positivity and not their negativity. When they say something that is ugly, it’s ok t not agree with them. Tell them so, “I’m sorry, but I just don’t see it that way” do it with a smile, not a demeaning sly grin, but, let them know that you are thinking differently.
The ones that are determined to stay unhappy will go away, disgusted by your inability to feed into their problems. The ones that want to be like-minded will gravitate towards you with ease. This is important for a cohesive society because we need to be breeding positivity and success.
You can’t wait for someone else to start this. When you go to work, the grocery store, church…PTA meetings…wherever, don’t be afraid to tell others positive things about themselves. Smile, be warm and friendly. Let them know that you are there to be a friend. Then set that tone.
So today, when you interact with the people around you, motivate them. This can’t be done with negativity. It must be done with positivity. Tell them “I know that you are a get-it-done type of person”. Tell them the good things about themselves. Point them out, even if they don’t have those qualities visibly, point out that they have them, and if they think that they don’t…then why do you see it? Obviously it’s there, because we all have it, the natural talent of being happy, it’s up to us, not the environment.
Don’t allow the environment your in to change you, you change it. Don’t let the negative garbage or our pasts dictate how we feel and act today. We have a choice and it’s ok to use that option…
Jeff Utnage 823469