I wonder what my expected end is. How will I know I’ve reached my goals? What will prison equality look like? I fear that as long as anyone can be a corrections officer and required ongoing mental health and psychiatric treatment is optional, we are always going to be battling some personal front and some form of racism. The reason is in here these people have total control and they protect it. Wielding it like a weapon frequently as a form of punishment and acting like mean little kids.
Ultimately I know I put myself here and a mentally unfit corrections officer who steals our families postage stamps before they get to us is the least of my worries.
What is my worry and concern is LGBTQ recidivism. I think I can be a major part of ending it in prison. Get our people out of this dark and grimy place for good. Layout a plan that will get LGBTQ the help they need and then move to the community and refocus our efforts there to prevent instead of damage control. I have been told lately that it’s impossible and I couldn’t possibly reach them all especially as broken as I am. After all, how can an inmate possibly rise above all this? I say to them this “Watch Me”. Pretty simple, I just don’t recognize impossible. I have been told its impossible to fix a sex offender. Watch me. I’ve been told its impossible to do many things. I used to listen and stop trying. I want to tell you this: When someone says its impossible, that’s true for them. But for you, defeat starts in your mind and then comes to be through words. For you, dears, all things are possible. Its not to late, its not a lost cause and its not impossible.
I totally believe that I can end crime amid the LGBTQ community. I dont care what anyone thinks about that. My only obstacle is how? And will I have to do it alone? Either way, this is the path I’m on and I dont care if I walk the whole damn thing by myself. Our family deserves wholesome and healthy communities and I aim to provide just that. The only ones effected by my criminal history is someone who is not me. Its an obstacle, sure, but it sure as hell doesn’t mean I am gonna lie down and die. Idly sit back and watch and complain as humanity unfolds. No sir, we can help fix it right now. It starts with support, leading by example, doing the right thing and provoking your circle to do it as well. It starts by being successful and willing to change and to admit that we are broken and need help. Then, taking the time to help others even when we are in repair. Its tough, but worth it. I will be apart of the solution even if I’m the only one who will.
Hopefully you will agree
Jeff Utnage 823469