Why I Believe The Things I Do

A new friend asked me recently, who is not gay, “I don’t get why you believe in God, doesn’t the bible bother you?”. I thought this was a good question so I want to address it. 

First, everyone has a point in which they would believe in a Supreme entity such as God. Some point could be reached in which they would say to themselves “OK, I’ve seen Him, He’s real”. Whatever that ‘proof’ would be. Having said that, my ‘proof’ was provided and that’s it. I won’t go back because if I said there was no God I feel I would be lying.

This is why I am Christian because I have no choice but to believe in God, because to me He’s proven His Himself. I understand that not everyone gets that. Cool, no problem. But as for me and my temple (my body), I worship God. So whatever the Bible says I have to negotiate through the brain of a gay man. I believe in God, I also believe He made me gay, period. 

I am not a mistake or the result of a curse. I was made intentionally and for a purpose and I could care less what anyone has to say about it. Let alone some sad screecher preacher who uses the Word of my God to promote segregation and make refusing service to Gods creations OK. Good luck reconciling that to Him btw, the first question He’s going to ask in regards to that is “How is refusing to serve love?”. (I am referring to pastors who refuse to marry same sex couples or businesses that refuse to serve same sex marriages or events).

For many people this topic is a hot one, but for me its mine to sort out. I have found a lot of peace and joy and personal growth from God and I know I have more coming. Why wouldn’t I want everyone I meet to have that to? But I am not naive to think I have the ability to prove God to anyone.

So for those who don’t believe, I love you and I want to be your friend, not because I want to turn you, but because I need friends. Real friends.

To those that believe, I love you and I want to be your friend. Because I need to be able to grow as a follower of Christ and the church that’s within this prison is run by a man who promotes the hatred of homosexuals, albeit passively, but that’s where I’m at. I need real friends.

With Love
Jeff Utnage