Monday, October 22, 2018

Life Lessons From Inside Prison by Jeff Utnage

This morning I had to attend a meeting where community members came to support a program and interact with us. These are exciting moments for me for multitudes of reasons, this one meeting was of particular interest because it was for Defy Ventures.

I spent the morning making hair product ( I combine Vaseline, conditioner, cocoa butter lotion, and vanilla oil) and decided today might be the day to use something special. Because I am in a men's prison, makeup is not available like at women's prison (because apparently DOC doesn't truly consider trans women real women...), however, I did discover that liquid foundation that is supposed to be clear...isn't actually clear. I also discovered that foundation makes freshly shaved faces very, very angry. But you know what really makes freshly shaved faces with not really clear foundation angry? Trying to wash it off.

Yeah, imagine my surprise when I'm looking in the mirror thinking "wow, that really does cover up my dusty shaved lip, no stubble! But, it makes me slightly discolored and with no makeup to finish the face, well, let's wash it off." So, with five minutes to go before I'm about to be face to face with actual business professionals I take a warm cloth and wipe my face, only to discovery, ladies know what I'm about to say, that foundation doesn't just wipe off with warm water and a cloth. Ugh!

So I used a bar of soap and a wash cloth to scrub the living crap out of my freshly shaved, angry, enflamed face and then repeated until my face was free of concealer. Yay. But it left my lip pissed off and bleeding.

I wrap up with this life lesson: Don't experiment with makeup when you have a really important, potentially life changing meeting. Wait until after...

Oops.

With Love
Jeff Jeffebelle Utnage 

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